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Today we’re addressing ADHD overwhelm + chaos, inspired by a reader’s question that I think many of you will resonate with. If this is something you struggle with, I invite you to share your experience in the comments – what works and what doesn’t.
Managing ADHD Overwhelm + Chaos: A Reader Question
Here’s the question I received:
“I’m trying to figure out how to better distribute my energy to sustain a manageable level of harmony in all areas of my life—career, parent, wife, self-care, friend, homeowner. As a time-blind ADHDer with poor time management, planning, and organizational skills, I’m constantly chasing shiny objects and feeling tugged in 50 directions at once. I run so hard every day but feel like I have nothing to show for it. Or maybe I feel good about one area of my life but look back at the trail of chaos in all the other areas, and it takes the wind out of my sails.”
Sound familiar? It certainly does to me.
This is a daily struggle for many of us with ADHD. We often think that finding the right productivity system or planner will solve everything, but that’s not the case.
Here’s the truth I need you to hear: the only way to manage chaos and overwhelm is to address it at the source—and that source is you.
Understanding the ADHD Brain
First, let’s get one thing straight: you are not broken. Your brain is not broken. Our brains are more like Ferraris—high performance but hard to control—compared to the predictable, steady Toyota. We think fast, broadly, and have more ideas than we know what to do with. This can be both a blessing and a curse.
The real issue lies in our “capacity meter.” We often don’t know how to gauge how much is too much, so we take on more than we can handle. This leads to dropped balls, missed deadlines, and a general sense of chaos.
Takeaways and Actions
1. Accept Your Faulty Capacity Meter
Accept that your capacity meter is a bit faulty. It’s always going to assume you can take on more than you actually can. To compensate, you need to learn to pause before agreeing to new commitments. Put new ideas in a “someday maybe” file and revisit them later.
2. Prioritize Ruthlessly
Be clear on your priorities at any given moment. What is most important in this season of your life? Is it your kids, your career, or perhaps your own self-care? Focus your energy on these priorities and let other things take a back seat.
3. Manage Your Inputs
Identify where your distractions are coming from and minimize them. Is it social media, TV, or even well-meaning friends? Patch these holes by removing or limiting your exposure to these distractions. For example, I’ve removed TikTok from my phone and only follow dog accounts on Instagram to reduce cognitive clutter.
4. Implement a Weekly Planning Routine
Every week, take time to plan. List your top three priorities and your “one thing” for the week. This helps you visualize and focus on what truly matters, making it easier to follow through.
5. Adopt A Minimalist Mindset
Less is more. This applies not just to physical stuff but also to ideas and digital content. By paring down, you reduce cognitive clutter and make it easier to focus on what’s important.
Final Thoughts
If you’re willing to accepting your brain’s quirks, prioritizing ruthlessly, managing your inputs, planning weekly, and adopting minimalism, you can create a more harmonious life. I know this, because I did it myself.
It’s not going to happen overnight, but with consistent effort, you will see improvements.
I hope you found this helpful.
Christina Kemp says
I’m definitely an over committer. I am an obliger personality with ADHD (late diagnosis) and I will continue to add to my plate already knowing I don’t have the time then my brain gets overwhelmed and shuts down. I’m learning that I am not everyone’s savior when it comes to getting tasks done. It think part of that is a control thing too, so learning that if it doesn’t take my voice or personality to complete something, it can be automated or delegated.
Caren Magill, MA, CPT, RYT & ADHD Life Coach says
I am very similar and I agree there’s a control element to it. glad to see you’re aware of it!