Head's up, there could be affiliate links ahead!
Y’all, if you have ever noticed that you tend to dominate conversations or you walk away from a conversation feeling like, “Oh my gosh, I completely overshared,” and then have that overshare hangover—well, you’re not alone. I feel that way a lot too. In today’s post, I’m going to break down why that happens, what you can do about it, and introduce you to a cool new tool I’ve found that helps manage the tendency to over-talk and overshare, and then feel really cringey about it afterward.
The Role ADHD Plays in Oversharing
Let’s start by addressing head-on why some of us overtalk and overshare. There can be many reasons for this, but when you have ADHD, a couple of very specific reasons typically stand out.
Hyperactivity: When you’re a kid with ADHD, hyperactivity might mean you bounce off the walls physically. But as you become an adult, even if you stop bouncing off the walls, that hyperactivity doesn’t just go away; it internalizes. This means your brain and your thoughts can become extremely hyperactive.
One way to deal with this is by verbally processing. Many of us are verbal processors, meaning that speaking out loud helps us process what’s in our brain because sometimes it can be really tough to just think inside our heads.
Impulsivity: Impulsivity can also play a role. Our desire to verbally process can often be three steps ahead of the filter we have in our heads, which tells us whether or not something should be said out loud. I don’t know about you, but I get into trouble with this one a lot.
Struggling With Internal Processing
For a lot of us, thinking inside our heads is not an easy task. We often hear people say, “When you have a lot on your mind, go for a walk, and by the time you get home, you’ll have clarity.” While this might work sometimes, many of us can’t hold all the details in our heads long enough to solve a problem without getting distracted. Whether it’s a relationship issue, a conflict, or even a complex math problem, holding onto all the information at once can be a challenge.
The Value of Verbal Processing
Verbal processing helps us get clarity on our thoughts. Hearing ourselves voice what’s in our heads allows our brains to process it in a way that makes sense and helps us problem-solve. This happens a lot in my coaching practice, and it’s also something I’ve experienced in therapy. Clients often come in with an issue that’s front and center in their minds. Once we start talking, their brains take over, and with a bit of guidance, they can talk through the problem, identify challenges, and figure out their own solutions.
“Verbal processing helps us get clarity on our thoughts. Hearing ourselves voice what’s in our heads allows our brains to process it in a way that makes sense and helps us problem-solve.”
The Downsides of Verbal Processing
While verbal processing can be fantastic, it can also get us into trouble by making us dominate conversations. Sometimes, we’re so caught up in verbally processing that we’re not fully aware of what we’re saying until it’s too late. It’s like we’ve said something we didn’t mean to, and then we’re stuck trying to walk it back. Trust me, I’ve been there.
Conversations and Oversharing
The ideal situation would be having a super patient friend or a coach or therapist on speed dial, ready to listen to us verbally process whenever we need to. But, of course, that’s not realistic. Most people don’t want to sit and listen to us verbally digest everything on our minds.
Leveraging AI to Manage Oversharing
One thing I’ve been insanely nerding out on over the last year is how we can leverage AI to capture our verbal processing. This tool can record our ideas, thoughts, and everything floating around in our brains. There are lots of tools now that take voice recordings, summarize them, and send them back to you.
However, I recently found a new tool—Me.Bot, which is the sponsor of today’s post. Me.Bot is designed to not only let you verbally express yourself as often as you want but also get to know you over time. It finds patterns in your conversations and tags them, so when you’re processing a future issue, it can reference past conversations that might be relevant.
How Me.Bot Works
It’s not just great for verbal processors. You can put anything into this app—pictures, typed notes, and uploads. It categorizes and remembers whatever you input. Over time, it becomes that objective friend who listens patiently, never tells you that you talk too much, and even helps with action items.
Actionable Features: If you’re talking about things you need to get done, like a dentist appointment on Wednesday at 3:00 PM, Me.Bot will pull that action item out and create a to-do item and a reminder for you.
My Experience with Me Bot
Here’s how I’ve been using Me.Bot in different scenarios to get to know the whole me:
Morning Routine
First thing in the morning, I use Me.Bot to record any crazy dreams I had so I can remember them later. I talk about how I’m feeling, how I slept, and what might have contributed to a good or bad night’s sleep. Then, I verbally list everything I need to get done that day or week. The great thing about the app is that it creates to-dos and reminders at specific times.
Example:If I have a dentist appointment on Wednesday at 3:00 PM, Me.Bot will make a to-do item and create a notification to remind me.
Throughout the Workday
I love using Me.Bot throughout my workday to record how I’m feeling after completing different tasks. I set it to prompt me at scheduled times to ask how I’m feeling, which helps me understand which tasks drain me and which ones energize me. This way, I can adjust my schedule accordingly.
End of the Workday
At the end of the workday, I use Me.Bot to celebrate wins and talk about what I accomplished. I’ve also started asking it to suggest dinner ideas based on what I’ve told it I enjoy eating. It even reminds me to check my saved Instagram posts for recipes I’d planned to try.
Shaping Your Day with Me.Bot
Using Me.Bot has significantly changed how I structure my day. It allows me to offload mental clutter, figure out what truly needs attention, and ensure I don’t forget essential tasks or appointments. It’s like having a personal assistant that’s always ready to help and never judges.
How You Can Get Started
Me.Bot is still a new tool, and the developers are constantly refining it and looking for feedback. I’ll put a link to the tool in the show notes, and if you use that link, you’ll get a free 30-day trial to see if it helps you get clarity on your thoughts, make important decisions, or remember tasks throughout the week. I hope you give it a try; I’ve been absolutely loving it.
Leave a Comment